Ya jist cain’t cure stoopid!

I think my building manager is fighting a loosing battle...

it’s too bad…cos he’s not a bad guy, but the property manager’s mandate is to keep the building full and as a result…some of the people now living in this building are of less than stellar intelligence….

case in point…

there’s been ongoing security issues …cos they can’t seem to get the people that live on the first floor to understand that going to work in the morning via your patio door and leaving it unlocked all day does not make a secure building

so to alleviate some of the stress the single and elderly women feel, the property manager had them install a chain link fence with a big ole gate that locks and is keyed to the master door key

but apparently closing the gate is too hard for some…no less than a week ago, the manager’s wife spent an hour stuffing letters into everyone’s mailbox about keeping the gate closed so that everyone in the building is safe…

tonight I come home to find a truck parked in the walkway….the gate is propped open…as is the back door….it’s about 5:45PM

hmmmmmmm that’s secure?

but there’s a brand new still in the wrapping from the store sofa in the back of the truck so I assume that once they get the sofa moved in all will be well
I go into my apartment…change my clothes, check my email, get my library books together, get my coat and shoes back on and head back out the door to go to the library….

door and gate are still open

I get in my car…drive around the block to the library…go in, drop off my books, peruse the fast reads, pick out some books and stand in line to check them out…

I go outside, get back in my car, drive around the block to my building

and low and behold the gate is still open

only now there is an old sofa on the lawn and the new sofa is wedged in the open back door with these 2 nuclear physicists trying to figure out how they are going to get the damn sofa up the stairs if they can’t get it through the door…

I suggest the double wide front door and the elevator and they both look at me like I’ve grown horns..

“what” says I “I’ve only lived in the building for 10 years….it’s not like I’d know how everybody else does it!”

and so they continue to struggle….

finally they get the sofa outta the door so I can get into the back hallway, and I suggest “maybe you should close the gate? you know? sorta for the security?”

“Naw”…they both say

Yup…ya just cain’t cure stupid….

pardon me while I go check the locks on my doors and windows will ya?

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A Country Boy Can Survive

I used to live with a fellow
who’s name was Cavanagh

he was good looking
he was smart
he was aboriginal
he was a rigger welder
he was from a family of 9 kids
he was raised hard
he was strong as a bull
often as dumb as one too
and
he was a dysfunctional illiterate

but he was smart enough to “get around” it
he could write his name
and I read all the important stuff to him
he was also a mathematical genius
without a calculator…
which explains the kind of work he did

in those days my self esteem was less than stellar
and I found myself
living in a 2 room cabin
in the woods
at the end of a long dirt road
with no heat (save a wood stove)
no electricity
no running water
in NW ON
in the dead of winter
just us
and the horses
and the chickens
and the dogs
at -40 degrees

cos I thought I was in loooooooooove

oy…the stories I have!

but the reason I decided to tell you this today
is that I’ve run across a video
that brought my almost 10 years
on again off again
with this man
right back like it was yesterday…

with each time he head this song
Cavanagh he would sing along
and frankly
for all his prowess
and aptitude elsewhere
the man couldn’t carry a tune in a bucket!

over the 10 er so years
that Cavanagh and I lived together
this song was his theme song
no question
he abused other tunes
but this was consistently the one
that he felt a kinship to…

and over that same 10 years
I set about removing every instance
of that song I could find
every single chance I got

probably cos it smacked too closely of my life
with Cavanagh

I threw tapes out truck windows
I threw albums in the wood stove
I hid them in my knitting basket
and I dropped them into the outhouse
over and over

yet somehow he always found
another copy somewhere….

over the 10 years
I could surmise that he’d purchased 100 copies
of this song….
virtually single handedly keeping this man’s
career alive
I guess…..

and here’s the link if you can watch an embedded video
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I4s0nzsU1Wg

and the words
for those of you that want to follow along
LoL

~A Country Boy Can Survive – Hank Williams Jr.~

The preacher man says it’s the end of time
And the Mississippi River she’s a goin’ dry
The interest is up and the Stock Markets down
And you only get mugged
If you go down town

I live back in the woods, you see
A woman and the kids, and the dogs and me
I got a shotgun rifle and a 4-wheel drive
And a country boy can survive
Country folks can survive

I can plow a field all day long
I can catch catfish from dusk till dawn
We make our own whiskey and our own smoke too
Ain’t too many things these ole boys can’t do
We grow good ole tomatoes and homemade wine
And a country boy can survive
Country folks can survive

Because you can’t starve us out
And you cant makes us run
Cause one-of- ‘em old boys raisin ole shotgun
And we say grace and we say Ma’am
And if you ain’t into that we don’t give a damn

We came from the West Virginia coalmines
And the Rocky Mountains and the and the western skies
And we can skin a buck; we can run a trot-line
And a country boy can survive
Country folks can survive

I had a good friend in New York City
He never called me by my name, just hillbilly
My grandpa taught me how to live off the land
And his taught him to be a businessman
He used to send me pictures of the Broadway nights
And I’d send him some homemade wine

But he was killed by a man with a switchblade knife
For 43 dollars my friend lost his life
Id love to spit some beechnut in that dudes eyes
And shoot him with my old 45
Cause a country boy can survive
Country folks can survive

Cause you can’t starve us out and you can’t make us run
Cause one-of- ‘em old boys raisin ole shotgun
And we say grace and we say Ma’am
And if you ain’t into that we don’t give a damn

We’re from North California and south Alabam
And little towns all around this land
And we can skin a buck; we can run a trot-line
And a country boy can survive
Country folks can survive

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