I just read Geni’s blog and it reminded me….

I have a fondue story from the Holidays…

I’m at the cuz’s and on New Years Eve she breaks out the chocolate fondue fountain…the kids had a blast dipping fruit and marshmallows and when they wound down she re-set it for the adults…

we had some and then went into the living room to watch the last ever Air Farce on TV
while we were otherwise occupied her youngest son heads into the kitchen…

the next thing we hear is “oh shit….oh shit…ohshitooooshiiiiitt” from the 8 yr old

the fountain operates with this corkscrew thingy down the center…it literally pushes the liquid chocolate up from the basin to pour out the top of 2 levels like a (I don’t know?) fountain….

the boy had tried to get chocolate on an almond…he couldn’t skewer the almond so he tried to use his fingers…the almond dropped – landed in the chocolate at the base and then somehow slipped into the base of the corkscrew…the corkscrew tipped over but kept revolving…and all hell broke loose…

ya know in the movies when someone takes the mixer out of chocolate brownie mix while it’s still turned on?

ya…like that
only worse… methinks cos it’s like liquid
and chocolate…

he wasn’t old enough for it to compute that he needed to pull the plug…

we literally had to scrape chocolate offa the ceiling with a pastry scrapper (on an aside…what kinda people own a pastry scraper at home?)
his mother laughed so hard I thought she’d wet herself
and
we laughed the whole time we cleaned up
the poor kid was so upset that he’d “ruined” our fun and his parents tried so hard to have a conversation with him about his use of expletives…it didn’t work

we just laughed and laughed some more till we cried and hiccuped!
we laughed so damn hard not one of us got a picture…

I found residue chocolate in the china cabinet the next day…
I didn’t tell anyone…just cleaned it up and called it a day…

out on the corner with cast iron blood
10,000 or more with hearts on the run
the say i might die and I may be cold
I may have no jesus I may have no soul
In prison I hear there’s time to be good
but the first thing you see is the last thing you should

Well i’ve seen the battle and I’ve seen the war
And the life in here is the life i’ve been told
Yeah i’ve seen the battle and I’ve seen the war
And the life out here is the life i’ve been sold

They say theres a passin’ where all stand to judge
but the devil’s a waitin’ with Christ like a son
when the look comes your way best say was I
for the reasons you hold give reasons to die
the calling’s impatient and cause never won
but the last one to say it may last through the flood

Well I’ve seen the battle and I’ve seen the war
And the life in here is the life I’ve been sold
Yeah I’ve seen the battle and I’ve seen the war
And the life out here is the life I’ve been told

I’m born in weary but life’s just begun
and i’ve run from the reasons and run to the gun
they say i’m the killer and thy will be done
and the doors won’t be open when I finally become

and i’ve seen the battle and I’ve seen the war
And the life out here is the life i’ve been sold
yeah i’ve seen the battle and I’ve seen the war
And the life in here is the life i’ve been told