Dr.s make me crazy…


A year ago in May I had a heart attack and a doctor put two stents in me and at that time he prescribed drug called Brillanta which is used to keep the stents open for the first year of your stents being in your body.  

I started taking this drug in May 2020 and it wasn’t until December 2020 that another doctor realized that the symptoms I had (inability to catch my breath, vertigo and dizziness and nausea and vomiting after I eat were a reaction to the Brillanta…apparently quite common reactions.  So he changed the medication to something else which caused a chain reaction and I had to have a whole bunch of my meds changed due to counter indications.  

Throughout all of this I have been vomiting daily I am dealing with the kind of nausea whereby I have to take as many as five Gravol a day and I am taking a medication called cholestid (4 at bedtime and two between 2 and 3 AM) nightly… to keep me from aspirating liver bile because I no longer have a gallbladder apparently.

I am nauseous 24/7/365….My bouquet of doctors have refused to prescribe something for the nausea until they find out exactly what’s going on with my physicality.

I had a CT scan in April and have been informed by both my G.I. and my surgeon that my stomach is now residing in my chest due to a double (ever the overachiever ) hiatus hernia.  I spoke to the surgeon this morning and I have an upper G.I. and a colonoscopy slated for the 13th ordered by the GI.  The surgeon wants to see the results of the upper G.I. prior to making a commitment to going in and fixing the hiatus hernia in hopes that it will stop the nausea and the Gravol taking and the throwing up after every meal… i’m gaining weight because the only thing I can keep down on the regular is potatoes or junk food….apparently I can eat all the junk food in the world but I can’t keep a vegetable or a piece of meat down.

However the surgeon is taking August off so I can’t see him in again until September 1 which means I’m going to be continuing to go through this Gong Show that is my life nauseous, vomiting and weak until the fall… Another whole summer of this.  

I realize doctors are human beings and deserve to take time off the same as everybody else but these doctors have known about this issue since last December 2020…and I will continue to suffer probably because I’m not vomiting blood until at least the fall if not later

And that just frustrates me beyond belief

kb

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I’m tired…

I’m just so damn tired all the damn time…

For a year now I’ve been trying desperately to get things done but I’m barely able to get the groceries in for myself before I completely run out of steam… Even if I have a good eight hours sleep… this morning I got as far as the pharmacy to pick up prescriptions and ran out of steam halfway through getting groceries which makes picking up the rest of the groceries and the drive home pretty shitty.

I know this is a combination of lack of nutrients and physical and emotional exhaustion… I feel like a broken record… I have all these projects in my minds eye… some get started some never do all of them waiting for when I feel better. I’m tired of being a whiny friend.

I have run out of things to try to make me feel better but it’s virtually impossible to feel better when you know that no matter what you eat or how little how much you are going to toss your cookies.

I’m only 65 years old… I shouldn’t be finished already. I shouldn’t hurt this much all the freaking time. Yesterday’s news should give me hope…

I find it hard to believe there will be anything beyond testing done before the fall. I don’t see an end in sight today.

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