so
when I first moved to BC in April of 98
I was sick as a dog
my Crohn’s disease had caused me
to lose a very lucrative contract
with a multi national
and I had been robbed
by a man I thought I loved
so
I had to declare bankruptcy
I couldn’t work
and I became the blob
that ate my mother’s couch
for many months
I tried to get work
but I was too sick
physically
and
emotionally
it’s not enough that depression
runs in my family
but that a side effect of Crohn’s
is depression as well
not having a job
having allowed myself to be
in the position
to have been hurt by a man
who turned out to be a liar and a thief
losing my house
my Nissan Pathfinder
etc etc
it all took it’s toll
so
over time I was able
to begin to get better
part of that was luck of the draw
like landing in the hospital
in my small community
putting me in touch with a Dr
that has since virtually
saved my life
over the years
there has been a slow upward crawl
of financial, emotional and physical health
and in 2008 I was able
to lease a car
which I flipped in 2012
and then again in 2016
a little red car
looked like a ladybug
I was so proud of myself
for having got the the stage
that I was advancing
to actually being an adult
In June of 2015 I found myself
sick again
this time
it was health, poor decisions,
grief over my father’s death
And an inability to admit
I was in the wrong job
things unraveled
and I found myself on medical leave
originally with the intent to
go back to work in late Aug
in July 2015 I broke my shoulder
while on holidays with my tribe
so an orthopedic surgeon decided
no work until October
In October,
when I got my medical release
from the surgeon
I was informed by my employer
that I was in fact not going back to work
and that because of my complicated
health issues
I should apply for long term disability
I applied
and was refused
so in Aug of 2016 my GP
also wrote a return to work note
for my employer
I ran out of short term sick leave
and accommodation leave
in Feb of 2015
I’ve had no income since then
I did not return to work at that time
and slowly have been repleting my
retirement savings
until they ran out in Sept 2016
it isn’t pretty
but the good news is that
my employer has now found me a position
that will start
April 3.
I was able to
with the help of a team of medical professionals
get myself to a point
where I feel better
physically and for the most part
Emotionallty than I have
in many many years…
that’s the good news
over the course of this mess
I’ve been in contact with the company
that sold me the little red car
as recently as last Thursday
to request payments since Nov
be deferred to the end of my contract
and was told it was ok
Friday morning
the car company issued a warrant
for repo of the little red car
I spoke to the bailiff
last night…
who has kindly allowed me until Monday (tomorrow)
to clean out the car
of my stuff…
and get the last run
of my meds and groceries
prior to him taking
the car back
I truly have mixed emotions
being in this position financially
has made me very sad and lost
to a great deal
over the last few months
and I’ve had a hard time not succumbing
to a great depression
and
my gratitude sometimes runs thin
but I know that these things
that have happened
are my responsibility
and although it will beat the hell
out of my pride…
I’m alive
and pretty much well
so I’ll move on.
…and damn the torpedoes.
anybody want to buy me some chocolate? LoL
